RE: SOCIAL MEDIA, MOTIVES, SOCIAL IMPRESSIONS VS. EXPRESSION AND REWARD


For some, it is an avenue of expression. For others, it’s about making an impression.

These two groups of people do not mix well together, and, as my brother would say, are like matter and anti-matter getting together. Lol

Let’s face it, I want my life to reflect my thoughts and ideas; faults, inappropriateness and all. This is because I believe I am this person for a reason. You want to avoid looking bad in front of others.

Well, I don’t think social impressions should be my guide. They are false or misleading. At times, even dangerous. So you never have to wonder if I’m having a good life, or a rough time.

Often, I’ll tell it all in my own way, as I see it. The good, bad- all of it. But I think some folks (not all) post those constant pics of happiness and wholesomeness that do not reflect their real lives. Only lies of omission, and creative play writing. I’m mean for saying that and I’m sorry. Here’s why: They often put pressure on people like me (who air our laundry, talk politics, the whole bit) for airing the bad with the good. AKA being honest. They critique with little fondue forks I confess I’d sometimes like to poke them in the eye with. (Just an angry thought, not really Kill Bill just yet)

I’m embarrassing them. Why? Because I’m not tastefully disguised? Shhhh. You aren’t either.

To those folks I want to say: I too am embarrassed for you. All the time! I just don’t tell them because I don’t want to hurt people. I’m telling now because they bring it up to me. Really, I think some are afraid to be honest and care way too much about the wrong things, like perfect appearances, or trying to control the impressions others have of them, which are always changing anyway. This is impossible and is not my right. They have a right to think ill of me, or that I’m an alien, whatever. They have the God given right to be wrong in their conclusions of me.

So this is what happens when I don’t post scary, funny, embarrassing stuff about my life. (And I also post funny memes and photos): It inevitably leads to some misunderstanding.

What’s extra frustrating is to hear the same people who scorn me for not sticking to their social habits, also tell me, “but you never told us those things”, after hearing they have misjudged some things. Assumed a bit much. Ok. Now what?

Oh I know what they would say. Things like, do it in private not in public. Ok. When did you hack my FB account and make it public? That’s just your assumption, isn’t it? Lol. Cause it never has been. Two: isn’t your fakery for all to see? Yikes!

A real life has a little wholesomeness, a little bad, some neutral things, and some fun pics to remember things by or show appreciation for. It isn’t about being seen in a favorable light by your fellow man, either, but you can do it that way.

But those social rewards (praise, admiration) often take some disingenuineness to keep up.

Also, it achieves reward on Earth from fellow people. Admiration carefully collected. Do cool things, sure. But do them being as you are, the only you there is, and as made by God. Do it for truth itself. Or decide that’s not for you. That’s fine too, unless you scold others for not being more like you.

Do it because YOU will know it is truthful. Not because you acted wholesome so others would want to be like you. You see, I have read the writing in red and taken it to heart. And I want appreciation just like others do. It’s on Maslow’s pyramid of basic human need.

Well, don’t expect appreciation constantly on an IV drip. What? Are you in “self-concept ICU”???  Good lord, wouldn’t you rather have that appreciation later, in Heaven or for a bigger truth? And be your true self, faults and all? Well, I sure would. A lot more than I would like struggling to contort myself to fit some social norm someone else finds important.

I wrote this because I wanted to speak to some criticisms often given in whispers or snarky tones to expressive people.

I hate to tell you this. But…In the words of Alanis Morrisette, I see right through you.

So does God. So do you, which is why you’re on an “adore me more” IV. That’s right. YOU’RE “on something.” You’re an addict. Happy Boxing Day (Canada) and merry Christmas.

If you’re going to dish it on folks with snide sideways remarks or open insults disguised as friendly advice? It’s going to get a response from heathens like me. I promise not to make a scene. I’ll just get real and articulate on you. (Gasp). After all, I’m not the actress. They make scenes. Sometimes very lovely pleasant ones. But we’ve seen this play before many times. Forgive us if we sit down to clap.

This is NOT directed at “you” (most of you) unless the shoe fits like the glass slipper fit Cinderella, in which case, it is. I’m sorry if I’ve hurt your feelings or yanked your IV out. But please accept me for me. Quit insisting I be “less like me” and more like you. That’s ruder than this post. No really, it is.

Ally

 

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